K C Bhanumathy

Bhanumathy Vasudevan

Sacred Cave for Women

Boundary series-6 – Boundary awareness

It is about continuous awareness in diverse relationships to be open, spontaneous and flexible to fully understand the context and the nature of relationships that we are engaging in life.

Let us differentiate between defensive boundary and pro-active /spontaneous boundary. In defensive boundary, the protection is for my vulnerability which I don’t want to show. In conscious boundary awareness, the protection is from my strength, for enabling self to act willfully for my own wellbeing, dignity and safety.

When we get ready for the day, grooming ourself before the mirror, boundary awareness is a part of our attire. It takes a minute to close our eyes and visualize our boundary- its shape, distance, what it is made of and who holds the remote to open the psychological space. For example, we are going into an important work or family meeting and you have to make important decisions, you know your group, your boundary awareness will help you to be effective and achieve what you want to do.

Boundary Awareness gives us the momentary wisdom of what am I going to do and whom am I going to meet/face and what boundaries are in place?


  1. Please watch your pattern of thoughts – what are they based on- fear, anxiety, worry, peace, excitement, – how is your inner world of thoughts and feelings? Based on that decide your boundary for situations you are moving into?
  2. Can you give yourself 2-5 mts space- transition time with yourself- taking deep breaths, watching the pattern of thoughts- as you move from one task/situation to another to bring mindfulness as a practice?

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